Transcript
Zain
0:00
Ladies and gentlemen of the class of 24, wear
Zain
0:04
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, purple would be it.
Zain
0:09
The long-term benefits of being a team player have been proven by political scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Zain
0:23
It's always been over. There's never not been a time that it hasn't been over. Trust me, on June 22nd, you'll look back at the start of the campaign and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility you thought lay before you. It's more over than you imagine.
Zain
0:42
Don't worry about the future. Or worry. But know that because it's over, you should be worrying about how to best bend the knee to Nenshi.
Zain
0:51
The real troubles in your political career are apt to be believing it's not over when it clearly is. Don't forget about guilt. Don't be reckless with other people's endorsements. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Remember Hogan's Law of Leadership Politics.
Zain
1:08
The frontrunner always suggests they're losing, and the loser always suggests they're the frontrunner.
Zain
1:13
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do after the leadership. Some of the most interesting people I know didn't know what to do after they lost. I should know. I'm one of them.
Zain
1:24
Be kind to your donors. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Zain
1:28
You are not as nerdy or sassy as you think.
Zain
1:32
Don't expect anyone else to support you,
Zain
1:34
except the tens of thousands of members you signed up.
Zain
1:38
But you never know if they'll bother to vote.
Zain
1:41
Travel, and I don't mean from Sunnyside to Hillhurst. If you want a solid path to victory, you're going to need to appeal to workers and rural voters. Live in Calgary once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Edmonton once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Zain
1:57
Accept certain inalienable truths. Kathleen will talk about her daughter, Jodi will talk about water, and Sarah.
Zain
2:07
don't mess too much with your hair. If you keep getting it cut a little bit every week, you'll
Zain
2:12
you'll be bald when you win the leadership.
Zain
2:15
Maybe you'll win, maybe you won't.
Zain
2:17
Maybe you'll get to be deputy leader, maybe you won't.
Zain
2:20
Maybe you should have dropped out months ago instead of lighting piles of money on fire.
Zain
2:25
Whatever you do, don't berate yourself too much. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's, except this one. It was clearly over long ago.
Zain
2:36
Don't feel like you need to vote.
Zain
2:38
It's obvious Nenshi is going to win, so why waste your time? The only election with a more predetermined outcome would be Russia's presidential elections.
Zain
2:47
The Calgary Surge are a great product. Remember, it's not just Take Back Alberta that can mobilize enough people to take over a political party. But trust me on the purple.
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